this is my buyer's remorse

One doctor responding to the American College of Physician Executives survey wrote: “I find it necessary about once every month or two to stay in bed for 24 to 48 hours. I do this on short notice when I get the feeling I might punch somebody.”

Good luck with that

Grandma: Katie, I think you ought to move back to Albany. Know why? Because I know lots of nice young people who stayed in Albany, and their parents bought them their own house.

me: So you're saying if I move back to Albany, Mom and Dad will buy me . . . a house?

Grandma: Good, I've convinced you! Now I just need to work on your parents.

how to make the most of law school tuition

"That's why I should go to law school. I can marry a lawyer. Sure, he might be a jerk. But, he'll at least be mature, and he'll make a lot of money. If he does something jerky, he can just buy me expensive sex toys."
--my friend Jason, meditating on how to meet men after college

Warning: Chinese candle does what it's supposed to do.

"Candles made in China may pose risk of burns."

-American Medical Association Newsletter headline, from Healthday 9/10/07

we can all dream

I'm going to leave academia in total and become one of those high-paid people who...makes a lot of money and...scoffs at everything.

--overheard at grad student barbecue

Now this would be innovative

We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.

--British army spokesman responding to rumors of a new tactic in Iraq

sounds like a common dilemma

Mike: "I was being bad last night....I got Jackie's boyfriend and another girl's boyfriend to dance with me, and then got them to grind with each other..."
Me: "Sounds...hot. What did Jackie say to you?"
Mike: "She said 'go for it'. She wanted to breakup before graduation anyway."
Me: "Wow. They sound like pretty cool straight guys....they are straight, right?"
Mike: "Well, Jackie doesn't know for sure..."

My only friend on myspace is my celebrity crush

And he apparently answers fan-mail! omg! SHALOM! [hyperventilates, swoon, die happy].
------------------------
Ivri Lider



Jun 3 2007 1:28A

Hey Phil, thanks for the comment, I'm really glad to know you like it.
Take care
Ivri
----------------------

I love "Dear Prudence"

Send him a "friend" request with a message saying you appreciate him helping you out in class the other day. Do not explain that you have also fallen deeply in love.--Dear Prudence

A: What about "I'd like to comprehend YOUR ontology?" If someone said that to me, I'd so want to have his ontological babies.
C: If he wanted to comprehend my ontology, I'd want to have his real babies!

boys will be boys...an email.

Men,

Seeing how the female species bond by preparing for formals/dances/anything really,
I propose that we men follow that example.

As you all know, tonight is the Lowell formal. Assuming that it starts at 10,
we can all meet in 20 Dewolf at 3:36pm to begin preparations, which will include
helping each other iron shirts, fixing each others ties (or teaching him how to do it),
a haircut for Jung, and if time, arm wrestling to determine who will shine whos dress shoes.

Please bring your tuxes and suits and shirts and we will help each other determine who pulls off
which colors the best. Makeup is optional. Cologne, starched-collar shirts, and a willingness to
sacrifice/share your favorite cuff links are not.

This whole process will probably take until 8pm. That means fortunately, we have about 2 hours to
complement how well each other look and also, take 100000 pictures and upload all of them
onto facebook within 3 minutes and 45 seconds. Hawwwt

Oh btw, i need to borrow someones...uh.... black socks becuase...uh...i think mine do not fit anymore.
Also, if anyone has CK's in2U i would love him. Romance for men or pi works as well.
Joony, i have the lacoste black belt (the one with the zig-zag designs on the side) and you can
pick it up whenever.

Before yall get excited and show up at the 09 boys' room please read the notes:

NOTES:
1) this is a joke
2) no, seriously, its a joke
3) that means, do not show up other wise you may feel very awkward =)

on that note, have fun tonight at lowell and we shall see each other all dressed up
and such.

much much love fam!

This should be a new Disneyland Ride!

"...we want girls, and boys, to have proper protection on their coital adventures."

-My OB/GYN professor, opening a talk on contraceptive use.

Yes, even I'd like to see this trick.

Japanese Bra Also Carries Your Melons

We've seen all sorts of bras before, but this is the first we've come across that helps save the environment. Dubbed the No! Shopping Bag Bra, this lacy red undergarment has padded cups that when removed, transform into shopping bags that can be used to carry around your groceries, laundry, or other purchases and reduce the consumption of plastic bags in the process. We're not sure those lacy strings would be able to hold much, so ladies, you may want to carry around an extra bra just in case. But if you're interested, the bra is made by lingerie company Triumph Japan. Click through for a look at the bra in action.

– Louis Ramirez

Facebook holidays make the world a better place

This is where the blondness becomes convenient --- "ohhh...I thought
national make-out day was last week. It's this week? ohhh. OK."
"Ohhh...you say it's next month too? It's every month? OK..."

--blond roommate L