I told Mom and Dad about your WOFIGO quote wall. They know it exists, but they don't know how to find it. I read all the Mom quotes and it was just horrifying.
--my brother

I had no idea this phrase had caught on!

At least you're not pregnant!

--my boss, to someone who complained about the heat

Oldie but goodie

"Tom, you're so deep in the closet, you're finding Christmas presents."

-Family Guy

Dorothy Parker, asked to use "horticulture" in a sentence

"You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think."

Kate has always been right about flirting. --Phil